We have 6 people who want to see properties this week, so appointments are made. I have 1 person to show around this afternoon. She is a lady of a certain age, who has been married a few times, and I think has done very well out of her past men. She has given me a budget of 500 000 euro ($630 000) to find a home where she can put up, with great en-suite comfort, her friends and then her family. She needs a small garden, no pool, and in good condition. Well, it sounds a lot of money, but at this time, it is a tough brief. I have selected a handful of properties ranging from a 19th Century renovated church to a very modern, circa 1990 home. She turns up looking like a true Parisienne, haute couture abounding, and of course, a small yapping dog. She rides in my car (sadly the aircon decided not to work , and with an outside temperature nudging 36 C, her coiffure decided to start flattening itself ), and we do the viewings. She is like a whirlwind going through the properties, flinging questions at me, wiping her finger along the top of a Louis XVI sideboard and inspecting her finger to see if it had been recently polished. She declares that she does not find any of the 4 suitable and tells me to find some more to show her. Back to the drawing board.

Tuesday. The first of my new clients arrive 15 minutes early. This is a bad start to the day as that first coffee of the day has to be consumed in peace, while feeling that dark, hot liquid going to work in the body. They are dressed as if they were on the beach and smell faintly of coconut oil. They belong to an ever increasing breed of first time buyers that are unrealistic about their budget and want the whole dream, and more if possible, for a handful of cents. They arrive, big and bright eyed, and are ready to be wowed! Sadly, I can’t deliver the wow factor for them- on paper anyhow. I show them the properties we are going to view, and they put on a brave face, but I feel that they are already disappointed. I show them 5 properties- all needing work to be done on them, all in small villages and all that look like an old granny has been living there who entered a time warp 60 years ago and never left it. Damp smells abound, and at 1 property we viewed, the owner showed us around. Bearing in mind that the time was 11 a.m., she greeted us dressed in her dressing gown. There was a chicken in the kitchen clucking around. I looked at this beast to try and decide if it looked concerned that its days were numbered and it was due to enter the large pot of boiling water I saw on the stove. I decided that it was a pet and that the pot of water was for soup made from one of its distant relatives. After the last property we viewed, we went to a local café and discussed our findings. I could tell that they didn’t possess the imagination to see past the rotten beams and chicken droppings and imagine their dream home. I suggested new built homes that we had in their price range. Their little faces lit, and I could feel a collective sigh of relief. No major renovations required and at most, just some light painting and decorating to suit their tastes. I dismissed them for the all important 2 hour lunch break, and told them to come back in the afternoon to see some more properties.