An Exciting Arrival in France
By Michael Bowditch

I had spent many months planning my escape. It relied on so many factors that I felt like a player in the Crystal Maze. All the pieces of the jigsaw puzzle were starting to take shape and I was about to cut free!

I was moving lock, stock and 2 smoking barrels to France from London to start a new life after 15 years stuck in pollution and the rat race. I had bought a 300 year old house 3 years previously in a small village in SW France, in the Languedoc. A small amount of work had been done on the house, but was in no way it habitable.

I had sold my house in London after many false starts, lies from potential buyers and finally, in vague desperation, accepted an offer at a lower price than the asking price. On the web, I had found a South African guy who specialised in moves to France. The date was set. The furniture and 37 boxes were packed and I was ready.

The removers arrived. 2 hours later, a small van that looked like it had seen better days was filled with my worldly possessions, driven away and I was requested to join van and man later on that day. I duly arrived at the mans’ home to be told by his wife that their best friend, who also does deliveries to Europe, was killed in a crash a few days previously. She asked me to make sure that I kept her husband awake during the long trip! Into the very uncomfortable van, Mike, the van driver, told me that he had never driven this van before. The gears groaned and crashed and we swayed along the main route from London to the port of Dover. Our ferry crossing was due at midnight. He happily announced that he had no intention of stopping during the trip, but was annoyed that the small diesel tank of his van meant that he was going to be forced to stop more than he desired, to fill her up.